10. Don't speed: No, having a cop sitting beside in the car instead of chasing you doesn't give you the right to travel above the number on the sign. They don't like that.
9. Don't make your turns too sharp: People often times have a good sense of humor, however rolling a beat up Buick through their prized lawns doesn't often bring the best out in people.
8. Don't flirt: A strange rule for passing your driver's test, but yes, a very relevant rule. Though you may be pretty fly for a white guy, wait until you have your picture taken after passing your test before showing off your new wheels to the ladies that probably couldn't care less anyway.
7. Don't try to run over traffic cops: These brave souls are public servants and are there to HELP YOU. Don't treat them as the cones used to parallel parking. They are somebody's relative somewhere.
6. Don't misunderstand road signs: No, the sign slow children playing is not an advertisement for the amount of children with down syndrome within a given area. It actually means to SLOW DOWN, because parents tell their kids to go play in the street.
5. Don't get too nervous: Wetting your pants is not a badge of honor. That makes you weak. Weak drivers are dangerous drivers.
4. Make sure your driving school instructor has all of the right connections: If you are going to be failing your test again, make sure that your cop finds your instructor's use of Old Spice strikingly appealing. If not, that's why we have public transportation.
3. Study, study, study: How do you study for a driver's test? You just have to live and learn. Plus, you might get a cop that will pass you out of pity for your beat up jalopy.
2. Don't sweat parallel parking: Man, half of New York can't drive anyway. Like those people can parallel park! If you live in an area in which parallel parking is important, drive a GEO Metro. Anybody can parallel park in a GEO Metro.
1. Know what the various pieces of equipment do on the inside of a car: When the cop asks you what each part does, rolling your eyes in the back of your head and pretending to die only works so many times. After that, an appointment with a secluded padlocked room awaits you.
Use these tips wisely, because it is your life and mine when you hit the road.
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8 comments:
that is very funny. I might try that when i take my test in september. LoL.
i will pass my test the first time i take it and i will have fun driving. see you on the road!!
Muahahahahah!!
That's funny. I should have done those when i was taking mine. A year ago.number 8 i did do though. She was fine. i asked for her number but she didn't give it to me. She was married. she was like 24 and she looking good!!!! ;-)
Very nice Monsieur T. Do I absolutely have to do one? I'm pretty peeved at the moment, so my humorous side isn't gonna come out so well. There's nothing funny about music tips, anyways.
I think it'll take me quite a while to pass my driver's test, when I actually take it, that is.
that is really good advise for an amature. these will come in handy thank you.
OMG...thanks for the driving tips!!! I have learned so much and I'm not even in a car right now!
When I go to get my license I shall do all these things, thanks.
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