My Own Country-- Chescow

Chescow
"Where Every Thing is Free Except For Expensive Things"




Chescow boasts a president that will be elected every year, because we don't want to get tired of the one we have. Our fearless leader will look something like this.



Every good country needs a strong Vice-President and Minister of Defense. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you these hallowed men for Chescow.



Every year, we will hold elections for President. If I don't like who my country picks, I reserve the right to deport the winner to a country of my choice. Our congress meets every day. I will be there on Mondays and Tuesdays from 10:00 A.M. to 11:00 A.M. The laws that they write will have to be agreed upon by me. If not , they will have to mess with my personal body guard Toby. This is Toby.


Toby hates people. He hates everybody. Yes, my country can boast everything that all good countries have. For instance, we have three branches of government. We have checks and balances to make sure nobody has too much power. Nobody questions me, because I am not responsible for Toby's actions. We have interstate highways, public schools, big business, strong economy, and all that jazz. Here is a picture of my currency.



New Approved Laws of Chescow
1) Nobody will be allowed to fly in a plane on Tuesday.
2) Nobody will be allowed to go to sleep before 9:00 P.M.
3) Nobody shall be allowed to own a dead sheep for a pet.
4) You shall stand by the flag each day and salute the great leadership, or you will be imprisoned by the sheriff.
5) Nobody will be allowed to drive a dune buggy.
6) Everybody in your family will have the initials C.O.W.
7) Nobody is allowed to put a hypnotized person in a store front window.
8) Everybody must bathe on Wednesdays.
9) The color pink is hereby forbidden.
10) Fast food restaurants will be closed upon receiving bad service.

Leading Industries: Sports, Entertainment, Food
The Vice-President of Chescow:


Chescow is a wonderful country nestled in the mountains of the Ukraine. Cut off from civilization of any kind, this country of 500,000,000 will go forever. The swampy marsh lands on the outside of the country keep out the unwanted people. Once past the boundaries of Chescow, the glory of the land comes to you. The sacred cow is the only item in this country that must not be touched. There is an eight month sunny season in which everyone will enjoy the beautiful palm treed beaches. There will be three months of Spring and one month of everything else. The architecture will be inspired by the Ancient Greeks.

My country is a wonderful place to visit because everybody is loved and respected. Gas never reaches over $1.00. Grass never needs to be mowed (cuts itself). There is no crime, because everybody has everything that they need, and guns are only allowed in the hunting grounds. The sports teams are the best in the world. The entertainment is the best in the world. This country is the best in the world.

Tourist Attractions:
The Giant Cinnamon Roll Festival: June 6- June 9
People in teams will make the biggest cinnamon rolls possible and then roll them down the street in a race. The winner will receive $50,000 of my own money. Then I get to eat their cinnamon roll by myself, and they have to work off their debt.

The Rock Wall: This divides us from our underdeveloped neighbors Farfignugen, Fartatopia, and Weirdonia.

The Drive Through Palm Trees of South Beach: These palm trees are linked together to form a tunnel big enough to fit a greyhound bus.

We leave you with a picture of our sacred animal, my humble cow Ju-Ju.